Oh Hello You!

Hello Blogging world!!

I've not posted anything ages, that because of my stupid exams, but now there all gone yey!

But now it's an end of an era, no more school, on to college and future life. I don't want to leave, because I've met so merrily inspirational people and to be honest I'm scared of loosing them, especially ones who mean something to me. 

There's some people who I'll quite happily see the back of and others who I couldn't face loosing at this point in life. I don't know what I'm trying to say here but what I want to say is this;

I like someone

And I love someone

Because the person I've loved I have for 5 years, this means that who I like, I can't go out with, not that I have any chance with them what so ever, but because I wouldn't allow them to have to suffer with the constant fear of having to compete or getting jealous because I talk to loads of girls all the time.

The girl I like at the moment, she's bloody brilliant. She's got an awesome personality, always lovely and bubbly and she'll put a smile on anyone's face and brighten everyone's day. She's beautiful, fit, kind, caring and understanding. She's just great, but every rose has its thorn, and although she's always happy, there are times when she's sad, and that's the worst thing to see, the person you like, crying her eyes out or upset over something, but the worst bit is when you can't actually do anything about it, you can't help them, you can only sit and watch. 

You see, the girl I like, she trusts me with stuff and knows I'm always here for her, but that's what I'm scared of loosing. I couldn't face not being able to help her or be the one for her to talk to, she's just so great. 

Generally, I just wish I could be there with her when she's upset and actually give her a hug or hold her tight when she's upset, and one day I hope I will. I want her to be able to text or ring me in the middle of the night and for me to simply reply or say "I'm on my way" to me that's what I'd love, just being there to comfort and console her.

But life isn't nice like that usually

But there's no harm in trying right?